Damon Dashed

So this might have been one of the worst nights in awhile. I watched the season finale of Nip/Tuck and it was good, but I get home and my mother breaks the news to me that Johnny Damon, signed with the New York Yankees. Of all teams in Major league baseball would Johnny Damon sign with the Yankees. For a man who looks like Jesus, he doesn't have much respect for anything that is holy. I mean the Yankee players get it, they don't play for us until at least playing for another team before signing with the Red Sox. We probably offered Andy Pettit more money than the Astros, but he said he would not feel right betraying his former teammates by signing with Boston. I respect that, that's like me or anyone on my high school basketball team transferring to Pelham High School to play basketball there. So why does Johnny Damon feel that it is ok to do this? I don't know honestly, all I do know is that everything Johnny Damon says about this issue is complete bullshit and that he is a big douche bag.

The next part of this post is going to get ugly, so you have been warned. Mr. Damon, I fucking hate you. How can you betray the fans of Boston this way? When you came to us you were no where close to being the player you are today. That special place in my heart for you, after helping Boston win a world series, their first in 86 years, is now gone for good, because you are a traitor. I hope when you are at your press conference trying on the your new uniform your severe stuttering problem comes back and you look like a fool in front of everyone, I hope you trip walking in or leaving either or and break your leg or tear a major ligament. You have lost hero status in my eyes, everytime I see your face from now on is going to bring me back memories, not of your days in Boston, but how much of a sell out and traitor you are. I mean I saw this coming, from all the shit that happened this year with you calling out teammates, and making it appear that you were unhappy, but there were signs of hope when you still had fun playing the game. I will forever hate you for this, and I will not wish you luck, because I hope this blows up in your face. I hope that when George forces you to shave and cut your hair, the New York Yankee organization will be your Delilah and you will be Sampson, powerless and hairless, you bald motherfucker.

In my eyes this signing makes him worse than Pedro, Bellhorn, Boggs, Clemens, or anyone else ever to wear a Yankees uniform after playing for Boston. Pedro is a scumbag as well but he didn't sign with the Yankees, Thank you Pedro for your service. Bellhorn yea he plays for the Yankees now, but the Red Sox released him, its not like there was an offer from the Red Sox on the table, so Thank You for your service. Boggs and Clemens they were on another team before going to New York, I forgive you both, plus Boggs is in the hall of fame as a Red Sox not Yankee. And to keep with my trend of insulting Damon at the end of every paragraph, Damon you will fit in nicely in New York because the Yankees Suck, and Jeter Swallows A Rod, and you like it in the butt.

Editor's note: David Sanborn agrees with everything written here.

Where Have You Gone Penny Hardaway?

Where have you gone Anfernee "Penny" Hardaway? You are on the New York Knicks of all teams, forcing me to put aside my hatred for New York during basketball season. Last time I saw you, you were addressing ESPN about the new Dress Code. Since then you have only played in three games, out of your teams eighteen. I miss you Penny, remember the good old days when you were in Orlando side by side with Shaq, you guys were unstoppable, but Shaq got sick of Orlando and fled for the West Coast. While you were in Orlando you had shoe contracts, your own mascot, and a few other endorsements. I remember the days you were on the Dream Team III, you guys won a gold medal. You were one of the best and most popular players in the league. I ask again where has the Penny gone?

You even had glory days in Pheonix especially the 2000 playoffs, remember that season? You led the team in Scoring for the playoffs, you really stepped it up against Los Angeles. After a number of surgeries to your knees, you're still going strong trying your best to do what you can to help a struggling Knicks team. Most have been calling for you to retire since you left phoenix, but I think you should stick it out, ask to be traded, do anything just so I can see you play before it's over for you. Penny I really do miss you.

Manny Ramierez

Ok so is Manny just being Manny or are the Red Sox about to part ways with the bipolar slugger who gave them 610 RBIs, 199 home runs, and 514 runs scored in five seasons with the Red Sox? In my personal opinion I see no scenario except for one where I would be satisfied to see Manny go unless we get a hitter that is on the same level as Manny, a player such as Vlad Gurerro. With that arm in right field and his bat in the batters box I would be willing to let Manny go. Other than that I can't part with the man, the fans of Red Sox Nation have come to know, love, hate, and tolerate.

I understand that Manny claims that he is not happy in Boston and who can blame him, as a Red Sox fan I know how much I expect out of the players who don the uniform that takes the field on the corner of Yawkey Way and Lansdowne street all spring, summer and if we're lucky the fall. Manny probably doesn't get much privacy from us the fans or the media in Boston, and one can ask how can you blame on us as fans, and the media even gets some leeway here, because he was part of the team that helped bring the city of Boston their first World Series title since 1918, and he has performed well in every season he has spent in Boston. But if he thinks he is going to get privacy in New York or any other city where professional baseball is, he is never going to be happy, because a high profile athlete like Ramirez is going to get attention everywhere even if he goes to Kansas City to play for the Royals, (the worst team in baseball in 2005), So if you are a Red Sox fan or a member of the media in any area, and you are reading this, leave Manny alone, let him live his life the way he wants to and hopefully he will stay in Boston and be as happy as possible for at least the rest of his contract.

Bill Simmons

Ok so there is this fairly famous sports writer, he calls himself the Sports Guy and he writes for ESPN. He has the job I want, because he can write about anything in the sports world he wants. I do not hate this man, but I want to make it very clear to everyone that he does not speak for all of New England whith what he says. If he comes at a New York Yankees player or the organization as a whole, not everyone in Red Sox nation agrees. I hate the Yankees I won't deny that, but I respect every single one of those guys because they are one of the greatest sports organizations...Pretty much ever. I hate A-Rod, but he is one hell of a baseball player.

Nothing gets my panties in a bunch more than when someone trying to argue about sports with me says, "Well Bill Simmons said..." I want to make it clear I am not Bill Simmons nor will I ever be Bill Simmons. My name is Joe and yes I like all Boston Sports, but Bill Simmons does not speak for me. He is a great writer and I respect him for what he does, and I hope one day I could be in his shoes writing about what I think of the sports world and have people think that what I say, is exactly what everyone in New England thinks, but they would be mistaken. I am going to see Mr. Simmons tomorrow at the Borders Bookstore on Broad Street, I'm going to shake his hand and beg for a job or at least an internship....


Please?

Chad Johnson

Almost everyone that knows me knows that I love Boston Sports and pretty much hate sports from any other city in the world. This is mostly true, but there is a part of me that likes other players from other teams because of the way they play on the field or off. Names come to mind, like Jerome Bettis he is an upstanding guy does a lot of work for charity he just seems like an all around nice guy. Then there are the athletes I just can't stand despite what they do on the field of play, ex: Terrell Owens, Randy Moss, Alex Rodriguez, Derek Jeter, Kobe Bryant etc. One guy I do have a weird liking to is Chad Johnson of the Cincinnati Bengals.

The first thing that comes to mind when you think of number 85 is his checklists, over excessive touchdown celebrations, his gold teeth, or his overall cocky personality. Saying that is what I hate about guys like Randy Moss and Terrell Owens, but I don't hate Chad Johnson, come to think of it he is probably my favorite player that isn't from New England. His overall cocky attitude is masked by the way he approaches it, he has fun with his job, likes talking to anyone who will listen plus he is one hell of a football player. He already has over 1,000 receiving yards with 7 touchdowns to go along with them. He’s been to pro bowls, and from the way he presents himself to the media he loves every moment of it. Some might be turned off by stunts like proposing to a cheerleader, or putting the football with the end zone pylon. Even with these shenanigans, he doesn't take himself seriously and that is always refreshing in a league where teams like the Patriots are few and far between. So Chad Johnson, if you're reading this...never change.

New Objective

Since my friends have taken this blogging thing to another level I have decided that I am going to update more frequently and have shorter posts, because I have also been infromed that my previous posts are too long to read so be on the lookout for shorter more frequent posts.